Sorry to say it... but you're so wrong!
I don't think it's any country where you can be yourself on the street and don't meet people who's stare at you or give you lowered comments.
It's still wierd for them to not wanna "fit in" and be like other "normal" persons, and I'm afraid it will stay that way.
I've never become sad or angry about the (not so friendly) comments I get from people everyday. Why should they direct me how to look, when I don't care about their ugly jeans!? It's up to them what to wear as long I don't need to put those pants over my legs and little butt ;)
I was hoping that more girls and boys would see through my (and all other goths) make up and accept me as the person I am. I don't need to be a devil worshiper just because I wear black clothes all the time, right?
I'm living in the second biggest city in Sweden, but it makes nothing better.
Folks here can be really evil and yelling at me on the streets as well. Most of the time I ignore what they're saying, and just thinking "Haha, you never know when you need a haircut next time and book a appointment at my salon " *evil grin*
It's for your own good that you stay nice and friendly to me so not any "accident" will happen ;)
" I've got the same skills as Benjamin Barker ;)"
Next time someone debases you, try to say something back that they not expect (in a friendly way), and I'm sure they will be very surprised and keep their mouths shut.
I wanna see more friendly and happy goths out there! Cheer up EMO-kids ;)
Love/ Iva Insane
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Adora here!
Thank's again pretty sister for your wonderful thoughts. And might I add; you look SO astonishing on this picture!
But I will have to disagree though. I mostly get sweet comments! So the people who writes in your blog and thinks Sweden is a lovely country to be alternative in have probably been told that by me! :)
Both kids and elderly ladies seems to have a flair for me :)
Sure, I've had my fair share of the "Is it Halloween already?", "Look at that witch" and other not so innovative sentences from those common people without imagination, but all in all I get many, many more compliments on my look in a positive way than the other way around.
Mostly kids and women, especially elderly women, seems to like my style and give me sweet smiles and telling me they light up when they see me and that they used to be a rebel (?) too in younger days. Haha, well, I can't really agree on being a rebel of any kind, I'm just born like this, but if it makes them happy to think I have an agenda with my look, let them think so :)
But I have to agree with my sister on one point. A bigger city is worse!
In my town with about 70 000 residents I don't cause that much commotion (well, not that I pay attention to anyway), but when I travel to bigger cities like Stockholm, Malmoe and Gothenburg people just walk into each other/lamp posts and straight into doors because they can't stop staring!!!
I'm not offended by the staring because I understand.
I am a rare thing to be seen, almost fictional looking, and I would probably stand and stare at myself with my mouth open if I ever saw me out in the streets. I tend to stare at alternatives, other beautiful people and extremly ugly people. And as long as I'm a starer myself I can't really complain.
BUT I've been a real bitch too.
Many years ago two teens were standing in front of me in a queue (we were the only ones) as one of the boys said, you know, bit too loud to make sure I heard it: "God dammit she's ugly."
Then I took a step forward, leaned over him and said:
"-You will look very ugly with my footprint on your face?"
I thought he might have pooped in his pants a bit because he and his friend immediately begged for forgiveness and said it was just kidding around.
I let them off with a warning!
I had a very wicked tongue as a teen too, so wicked that people only tryed once to be nasty, because I was soooo evil in my reply back I think I might have given them all hang ups for life ;)
It worked out fine! I just pointed out their "faults!; a curved nose, sleepy eyes, ugly teeth, big ears, fat ass (I have always been able to pull out the "fat-card" because I'm skinnier then most and to say something about a girls weight always hits hard),
I've done other stupid things too, but I'm not gonna say. In short I was no angel.
But then I changed and started to meet evil with a smile, so when someone out on town called me a witch I just walked up to them and asked them to repeat what they said and tells them it's very un-polite to say something like that about someone you don't know, and that it's better to try being nice.
They get very chocked when I'm answering nicely.
I'm better then them!
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I want to have your attitude about people. I like how you can just shrug people's stupid comments and do your own thing, that takes courage! I'm going to be myself more often without caring. I live in a small city but I want to move to Austin, TX. The slogan for that city is "Keep Austin Weird". I definitely feel right at home whenever I visit. Plus, i'll be finishing cosmetology school soon, and Austin would appreciate someone like me to do their hair :D Keep rocking beautiful!
ReplyDeleteYou and your sister both have great attitudes on life. <3
ReplyDeleteYeah there are a lot of short minded people in this world. Same story here, everyone say the dutch are really nice but I've had to deal with a lot of crap in the days where my look was more ' alternative'. The school next to mine harboured a lot of those narrow minded people and the best way to strike back was indeed the pointing out faults since they were all very insecure inside. I still hear them swear at me even when I was at the end of the street just because I (in reply to their comment ofcourse) called them fat. ^^
ReplyDeleteAlltså, folk har ju åsikter om allt man gör och hur man ser ut oavsett om man har en "alternativ look" eller inte så jag vet inte hur mkt värre det faktiskt är att ha en sån look. Visserligen ligger ni båda på den extrema sidan av skalan som börjar i beige typ men fortfarande. Jag tycker Sverige är ett tolerant land överlag, och det är inget som försvinner bara för att inte ALLA är toleranta. Det är ju inte som att människor som ser annorlunda blir luggade på gatan eller att människor generellt slår ner folk i platåer med målade ögonbryn och piercings lixom. Generellt behöver man inte vara rädd för att se annorlunda ut - och det gör Sverige fantastiskt (men SJÄLVKLART finns det alltid undantag).
ReplyDeleteTranslation; Sweden is a very open minded country even thou people here (as anywhere) have preconceptions and opinions on everything (not only if you are "alternative" in your looks). It's not very probable that you'll get physically hurt or assaulted just based on a different hairstyle or so. Maybe in some small town with hill-billy idiots, but not in a more general sense.
/Sarah
Hey adora and iva!! Thank you for sharing your stories and advice, in my area there are Manley chavs, they already ruin my life at school about the way my hair is and call me weird or mental...and pronounce my name in a weird way but you really grew my confidence for being my self thank you!! Xx ps- do you have any idea of a cool name starting from a? I want to change my name c:
ReplyDeleteHaha the 'footprint in ya face' part is just a win!
ReplyDeleteBut I agree, when you come up for yourself calm and mature, you will always stand above those close-minded retards, which mostly feel silly and hopefully regret what they said.
Uhg, everywhere are haters..
I have to admit I first thought Sweden's a bit more open-minded goth-land, haha!
But sometimes it is necessary to ruin there haircuts or kill them Sweeny-Todd style! Muahahaha
xox
I really hate those people, too. They call you names and don't except that you're different. But where is the problem? I can't understand these stupid people! Nobody can.
ReplyDeleteI just ignore people like that, of course it's hard, but when I would react angrily, it would just make them happy and they continue...
And I can't react nicely... [that's my fault! :(((] I really have to learn this!!!
I think it's kinda funny - I have also experienced people on the countryside to react differently than those in the city.
ReplyDeleteI grew up in a really small town (13.000ppl) and except for some classmates' parents walking up to my parents and telling them I was selling drugs (uh, sure... someone who has pink hair and ripped tights MUST be a dealer, everybody knows that to be true. ahem!) I didn't experience the offensive comments I heard from people in the big city where I lived for 3 years.
My explanation for this would be that it's because urban citizens are used to a higher level of anonymity which makes it easier to step out and offend others.
Still I don't get why people think they had to be offensive just because they don't like anybody's look. I don't insult preppy kids or emos either... but that's probably some weird type of social psychology dynamics. :D
the problem of small cities is that many times people are not so open minded than big cities people, and I think so becouse in my country, Italy, people are in general closed minded but in small cities it's much more... I live in a 25000 inhabitants and "strange people" are not so accepted...
ReplyDeleteHa! You think that in Europe is hard to be Goth? Try living in the smallest island of the Greater Antilles! A lot of people here are socially backwarded, they are "Christians" (who criticise everyone and are completely hypocritical)who are "fashionable" (Women tan a lot and wear super light concealer making them look like a Ganguro girl, and wear hideous things). they see me and start yelling the trick-or-treating chant, go like: "¡Uy!" (It's an exclamation we say when we're disgusted or scared), and just look at me and laugh. They do this to a Goth girl, but they still praise, adore and worship Lady Gaga.
ReplyDeleteBut it doesn't end with strangers, I get crap from my TEACHERS at school! And of course, the students. But TEACHERS? They are supposed to be professional and tolerant people! My biology teacher once told me: "Oh my goodness! You look horrible with all that black make-up! You remind me of a lady that would wear tons of blue make-up and wouldn't blend it!" "Why do you wear so much black? It makes you look older! Wear some pinks, some oranges, some yellows..." Yeah, says the woman who would rather keep her breasts firm than breast-feed her children. One kid at my school told me that I looked like a tranny, and many tell me that I look like a crazy person.
Oh! And will I ever forget the cleaning lady that came at a friends house! "Goths believe that life is death and death is life..." She was ACTUALLY concerned! Hahaha! This is why I made my blog, so less dumb-butts say stupid stuff at me and others similar to me.
one might think you are perfect and born that way (it's true you maybe were born with the right attitude and starting points) but it's wonderful when one reads about your reflections; once again one can see that what makes us perfect besides all the peculiarities and flaws it's self improvement, positive attitude and hard working! and maybe ignoring things that get in your way and you dont need...no one loves you for nothing after all! thanks for existing!
ReplyDelete<3 <3 <3
I lol'd at the "population of 70,000" thing, cause where I live we have a population of 5,000. 70,000 is considered rather large :'D
ReplyDeleteyeah the halloween comments are really getting old xD one time when i got the halloween comment (and i was in kinda bad mood) i yealled at that dude to come up with something more original. it totally worked ^^
ReplyDeleteHotondo no hito wa, ejjīna sutairu de machi o arui to, Nippon de wa kokoda to omou..
ReplyDeleteIt's so sad to hear that people scream evil things at you! I, too, always thought that Sweden was a super alternative-friendly place.
ReplyDeleteI have to say though, I live in Germany and even though you'd think it was quite conservative, people put up really well with my style, which includes lots of crazy stuff and leather.
The nicest thing was when I once walked down the street, dressed in ripped tights, boots and a spiked velvet blazer. An old lady came out of a shop and looked at me, I thought she was going to say something bad - and then she complimented me for being brave to wear that and how important she thought individuality was! That really made my day.. maybe even my entire week.
It's good to see that the fellow goths are proud of who they are and what they are. You are really nice people.
ReplyDeleteGood riddance Adora!
of course why people judge awesome people who dress in a different way ?? im not goth but im deffinity in love with your styles (adora and iva) and i have friends who are goths and i have been there when some "normal" dude stares at her and says "hey morticia" in order to offend her and ITS REALLY DAMN STUPID, i've been a bitch too just by offending who ever i wanted but now that im older i understand that its better to be nice and polite :) love you both Adora and Iva, you girls are the most beautiful girls i've ever seen
ReplyDeletesuck, Iva insanes gnäll alltså.. sen ÄR det betydligt lättare i sverige än i andra länder, ren fakta.
ReplyDeletegillar adoras positiva attityd :) man blir glad av dig.
Ni är riktiga inspirationskällor, både du och din syster! :) Keep up the good work!
ReplyDeleteA lot of ignorant people out there - doesn't mean you are skinny doesn't mean you don't eat, it just means we are luckier than others (genetics) and others have to say something ignorant because they are jealous and unhappy with themselves. - Narrow/close minded people gets no where in life, they like to focus and give negative energy on people, they like to waist time. - I can't gain weight and I eat a ton, I stand 5'7 feet and weighs 95lbs. Have you been to Japan? better culture definitely and you will LOVE it, you and your family should give it a go and visit. OR visit Canada where I live! ^_^
ReplyDelete